


When The Mayor’s Not Home

by orphan_account



Category: Hermitcraft RPF
Genre: Short One Shot, Truth or Dare, i wrote this in five minutes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-19
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-10 22:15:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 517
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28174512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: The HEP played a round of truth or dare. Tango found himself in an awkward situation.
Comments: 9
Kudos: 56





	When The Mayor’s Not Home

**Author's Note:**

> tangled trying to do dialogues-that-sound-like-the-real-hermits practice but add some tangpulse: the fic

“Oh, I have a good one. I have a good one.” Cub straightened his position, sitting cross-legged on the grass at the HEP’s ambiance room. “Tango,” he said, audibly smirking, “truth or dare?”

“Hell, really, Cub?” Tango crossed his arms. “Just after I did that dare of eating Papa K’s mystery Swedish meatballs?”

“Excuse me?” Keralis forked up another meatball and waved it around. “You loved it!” 

“Yes, you beautiful Swedish gourmet chef,” Bdubs said before anyone could reply. “Tango must have really liked it, sure enough he did.”

Keralis huffed. “Thanks, Bubbles.”

“Uh-huh,” Tango decided it’s best to agree with Bdubs before Keralis force-fed him more of the spicy hazard. “I’m going with Truth,” he said. 

“Oh—“

“Shut up, Falsie!” yelled Tango, despite False not even  starting  to snicker just yet. “I did Dare last time, okay? I’m not a coward!”

False shrugged. “Cool, man.”

“Alright,” Cub said, “Tango. What’s your weirdest kink?”

“Wha — what?” Tango forced a laugh. “What are you talking about?”

False inched closer to Tango, smirking ever-so-smugly — as if eager to see what he had to say next.

“Do you not understand what the question meant, Tango?” Xisuma asked — still calm and collected, as per usual. “You see—“

“No, I know what a kink is, I’m not dumb,” Tango said, his voice noticeably growing louder. “Really, Cub? All these possible questions and you went with that?”

Cub merely shrugged.

“I —“ Tango tried to speak up but nothing came out. He covered his face with both palms, tugging his hair out in frustration. “Oh, this is a dumb question, Cub, you jerk!”

He continued making weird incomprehensible noises of frustration that went muffled by his hands — which almost made Cub pity him, yet he didn’t get a chance to change his question.

For Bdubs spoke first.

“I can help you answer that.” Bdubs eagerly nodded, smiling bright as day. “I know you, Tango, my friend.”

“Tell us, Bdubs!” False said. She ignored Tango smacking her in an attempt to stop her talking. “Either we can make fun of Tango or get this over with. It’s a win-win.”

Tango groaned.

“I hate each and every single one of you.”

Bdubs sat up straighter in an attempt to look taller and to be taken seriously. He looked around the room, sharing a bright smile to all the curious players and a red-as-his-own-irises Tango, looking extremely pleased with the fact that he knew information the others didn’t.

“You see, lady and gentlemen,” he said, “this all started at Season Five, when I was at that mushroom mini-games area,”

“Just get to the point, Bdubs,” Tango muttered through his hands.

Bdubs glared at Tango. “Alright, fine, you demanding little —“ 

He turned his attention to the rest of the HEP members. 

“Tango likes spectating over Impulse playing whatever escape-room game he has each season, y’know,” he said. “For some reason, he found it intriguing, you see, being Gamemaster. More like Master, if you know what I’m saying —“

“Oh, this is the worst.” Tango stood up. “I’m quitting. Good-bye, everyone. I’m reporting all of you to Scar. Good night.”


End file.
